In my most recent Spring Cleaning effort, before this year’s Chinese New Year, I unearthed this
big humongous bag of clothes that I had stashed away after I had my first baby.
These were clothes I had loved and spent good money on. These were clothes I wore to classes in Perth. They accompanied me in law school and through all the late nights I worked as a lawyer in Singapore. They traveled with me and were ever present when I fell in love with the excitement of New York and the quaintness of Hoi-An. They were with me when my husband asked me to marry him.
See you again soon, I thought, as I packed them away with the great hope that my body would return to its pre-baby state, soon.
Little did I realise then that I would be changed forever.
Nearly 6 years, 3 babies and career switches later, I realise it would have been impossible to stay the same. My experiences as a wife, mother, lawyer and entrepreneur have made me come face-to-face with myself – my limitations, my strengths, what I want, and what I don’t want. These experiences weren’t all pleasant, or serene. For the most part, my biggest transformations occurred through the hottest fires. And just when I thought I won’t survive, I couldn’t hang on, I managed to muster up just enough strength to take that next step forward.
I’ve really realised and internalised the fact that life is too short and too precious to be wasted. Doing the same things will only bring the same results.
So, I am done, waiting for other people to see what I am worth. Because if I don’t realise my own worth, nobody else will.
I am done waiting for permission to be who I am, so I am embracing my own point of view.
I am done putting up with people who are a waste of my time, love and energy, so I’m keeping my inner circle tight.
I am done doing things that are meaningless to me, so whatever I do needs to make sense to me and what I want for my life.
I said goodbye to this bag of clothes after taking out a few keepsakes as reminders of who I once was.
There wasn’t any point in keeping them, and trying to squeeze into moulds that no longer fit.
Goodbye, Act 1. Hello, Act 2.